Okay so first up I owe you all a great big apology for just disappearing for the last 3 weeks but I have truly been so ill that the idea of blogging just plain exhausted me.

But I am putting that behind and moving forward from today , starting with the redesign of my blog which is now far more lifestyle focussed. I decided to marry my blog with my love of the sea and thought I would do what I call a NAUTI-GAL (he he he), yes that is a play on Nautical type theme ...because why not?
So although the design is not quite finished as yet it is well on it's way :)
(please bear with me)

On that note I just wanted to share a little about my personal journey and a bout of depression I had recently , not just a case of the blues but a debilitating depression.

So I know that maybe your eyes are rolling and I can almost hear you say 'oh no, not you too!' and thats okay ... really it is! Honestly unless you have experienced depression , anxiety and/or panic attacks I don't think it will ever make sense ... and that's okay! Consider yourself blessed!

p.s.   If you not interested in depression feel free to move on , you're forgiven :0)

For me I have not have a bout of depression since I got divorced some 6 years ago and so I did not even see this coming. I recently started a new job, one which is pretty much a job I've been dreaming about ... and then I got ill! It seemed like someone just stole my sunshine. I woke up stressing about my job, feeling inadequate, fearing being fired for no reason at all, getting out of bed became harder but at the same time sleep was my only escape from panic, fear and a racing heart. The more that I felt panic set in, I felt my stomach convulse and my irritable bowel syndrome kicked in with all the self induced stress.

I share this not because I feel you need to know, but rather to share the following: if you see a friend who goes from fun, friendly and happy to withdrawn, tearful and quiet ... take the time to talk with them. Pray with them if you have faith and just be there ... everyday in a small way.

Those dark days are the hardest and even someone with the strongest constitution toys with ideas of getting in their car and driving until the car runs out of fuel or running away and living with nothing but the clothes on their back and a car ...for some it may even be death (heaven forbid).

So I am grateful that through my faith and loads of prayer, my life is back on track not 100% but certainly far better than it was ... I am truly blessed for all the love and prayer I have recieved.

Thank you for your patience with me and hopefully I will soon be back in the swing of things once again.